When we were Together
by Ronai
Summary: "I'm sorry Mr Stark. It's cancer" Amazing, isn't it? How such a simple sentence could change your life so much. I was 19 years old, barely a man; and here I was, faced with a potential death sentence. I'm lucky to be alive, yet as I sit here writing this story, I find myself willing to give anything to go back to that time, back to when we were together. Back to Loki; TonyxLoki AU
1. Chapter 1

**When we were Together**

1

'I'm sorry Mr Stark…its cancer."

Those where the words that started it all- a simple sentence that turned my life _shit_ side up; here it was, my potential death sentence and all I could do was sit there. Stunned into silence for the first time in nearly 19 years…not knowing what to say, not knowing what to do. I felt so numb, but at the same time- so angry. Why me?

In the weeks to follow I was admitted to the Presbyterian Hospital to start the, at the time, seemingly impossible road to beating my own bodies aggressive assault. At first, I was in my own private room, but what with, well you know, me being me, I got bored of that fast; especially given how moody my so called "Personal doctor" was.

So upon request (translation – constant pestering of the senior doctor) I was moved down to the high priced, but not _quite_ private ward; and fuck me, I'd almost forgotten the simple joy of talking to people.

From there, it didn't take long to win over the nurses with my undeniable charm and grace; after all, I was known as quite the ladies' man back in high school, hint, hint~

However saying this, sometimes even the prettiest girls can't take all the pain away; so every day, at about 3pm, I'd go for a walk around the hospital- it was HUGE. But back then, I'd yet to start treatment, so I was able to walk like a normal person, and of course, it didn't take me long to see everything; not even a week in, and I was incredibly bored.

The nurses, though very nice, weren't the sharpest tools in the shed, they could do their jobs amazingly well- but holding up a conversation on any of my interests was rather painful… I wasn't used to this; I grew up surrounded by other, so called "gifted" kids…I deeply pined and craved for another sharp mind to rival my own…

Then not even two days later; I got one- I was halfway round my daily walk when I met him, well more like walked into him…but hey; His name, I would later find out by sneaking behind the nurses desk, yeah, don't tell them that, was Loki Laufeyson, the absolute honest personification of tall, dark and handsome with one hell of a tongue to go.

It was like a match made in heaven, even more so when I found he was only three cubicles away from me!

Two smart assed _**and**_ mouthed, I hasten to add, geniuses on a single ward. What could possibly go wrong with that? Sure, there were the odd verbal arguments, most of which I did admittedly start…but! He did retaliate, so I'm not fully in the sin bin here- or as Pepper would say, 'we're as bad as each other'. Though, between you and me, he's a lot worse. To think he kisses his mother with that mouth.

Buuuut, putting our general spats aside, me and Loki hit it off pretty well. We were no longer just poor, sickly 'little boys' with cancer; we were normal teenagers simply hanging out…we knew from the start of our friendship what cancer plagued us both, but we never brought it up.

He knew what I had, I knew what he had, and that's as far as we needed to go- In the short span of a month, we saw many people slip away; some who were already at deaths door upon our arrival, others who went to bed smiling, and simply stopped breathing during the night- and as much as we laughed and joked, we both knew where we were.

We were at the time, climbing a really high and incredibly steep hill, trying to find the peak… and even with all our support, there was always the chance that at any time of any day, one of us could fall down the hill…we also knew, that should that happen, we may not have the strength to climb it again.

That's what makes cancer such a bastard- the treatment you need to beat it, can also be your undoing in the long run should it take an aggressive turn…it's just a constant battle of trying to stop your own body shutting itself down…and I'd be lying if I said it didn't get tiring. Very, tiring…

But anyway, I'm babbling here aren't I? The whole reason behind this is to tell the story, not bore you all with sappy details, horrible writing and half assed grammar. But admit it; you liked reading my crap really.

After all, it's not every day the great Tony Stark takes a moment out of his precious lab time, to write about something as personal as this.

…

Whether or not you read this till the end is up to you. I know how it ends, I don't need to worry if you do or don't- though, saying this…does it really end? Is there honestly an end when I'm sitting here writing this in the first place? I guess that answer could be split down the middle.

After all, there's always an ending to start a beginning. So, let me take you back in time to mine; back to where Loki was always waiting for me.

'_When we were together.'_

* * *

**Welcome and thank you for reading chapter 1 of "When we were Together" :3 **

**And just in case people don't understand- this story is like a novel; but only this bit will be in first person, as it's the introduction. **

**From there on it's going to form into an almost movie setting; the typical opening and basic this is me, this is what's going on blah blah blah, then it goes back in time and begins showing the story like it were happening then and there, not in a memory.**

**Oh and no. No spoilers, you'll have to wait and see if Loki dies in this or not. The only thing I will say is this may touch on some pretty dark themes, and I'm planning to add in some really angst filled chapters. **

**So, I hope this chapter has interested some people, and that they may want to continue reading. And yes…this is eventual FrostIron (Tony x Loki)**


	2. Chapter 2

**Yay for being home from college all week =D Boo for being head-butted and losing my front tooth.**

**But hey…here's chapter two x33**

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"_Shit…ah, fucking hell…oh god…ahhh…P-Pepper…_Pepper, _help me o-out…ha fuck this inhumanely hurts_!"

Coming to stand at the threshold of the bathroom, Pepper's face was marred with a deep frown; this episode now marked the 17th time in the last month alone where she'd arrive upon request of Jarvis, only to find her friend doubled over the sink gripping his lower abdomen; his face scrunched up in pure agony as he muttered curses under his breath...

But, what good would lecturing him do…so shaking her head and sighing loudly, she made her way towards her long-time friend, slowly placing an arm around his waist and coaxing him to lean on her;

"For the love of god Tony, will you just go to the doctors already…"

"N-no need Pep…it...it's getting better…trust me."

"Do you not see yourself Tony? This clearly isn't getting better on its own, now either you man up and make an appointment, or I'll have Jarvis do it for you. And believe me when I say this Tony Stark, I WILL make sure you go- even if I have to take you there myself."

Shrugging her arm off him, Tony let out a small scoff before staggering towards his bed and unceremoniously flopping onto it the moment the mattress hit his knee's; he really did not need nor want the woman's constant nagging in his ear when he felt this crap. He knew full well this wasn't right…but he'd be damned if he went to a total stranger about something as personal as this…

"I'm telling you Peps…I'll just be wasting their time…sleep is all I need…_night peps_…"

And just like that, he was out; so allowing her shoulders to sag slightly, Pepper let out a soft sigh before making her way to the bed; bending down, she began gently brushing Tony's fringe from his face- trying to keep a straight face as she felt the heat radiating from his forehead. This wasn't right…her womanly instincts where screaming at her to do something…but what? Tony was such a stubborn ass at times…all the time.

Sure, even she at first rolled her eyes; simply under the impression he'd done another one night stand and caught something…in fact, she recalled laughing at, what she'd, at the time, called; 'sweet irony' she'd thoroughly enjoyed the males discomfort as she poked at his inability to keep it in his pants.

But nearly three weeks on, he was still in pain, and from what she could gather from Jarvis; in a lot of discomfort every time he'd try to relieve himself. Pepper wasn't a doctor in any sense of the word, but neither was she stupid when it came to getting things checked out, and _this_, definitely needed looking at.

Especially if it was something as simple as a bladder infection…all the symptoms where certainly pointing at that, but at the same time- Pepper was also aware that Tony's mother had died of cancer many years prior…and though certain it wasn't as serious as that…she was still concerned and felt it best for him to get it checked out. But, for now, she'd honour his request for sleep, and have Jarvis make him an appointment…he may hate her for it, but hey.

He may thank her for it in the long run…

* * *

"Jarvis, could I have a word with you please?"

Startling at the voice, the elderly man's eyes where somewhat wide as his grip on the china teacup tightened; "Oh Ms Potts…I didn't hear you coming…please, have a seat."

"Sorry…but thank you" Peppers voice was soft and sincere as she took the offered seat; Jarvis had always been her favourite butler in the house/mansion. And he was obviously Tony's to, being the only one he'd ever listen to, or on the rare occasion, go to for advice. After all, the man was more a grandfather to Tony than his own…she knew he'd stand by her on this…even if it did mean going against his masters wishes…

"Jarvis…I need to ask you a favour."

"Ask away my dear, also would you care for a cup of tea?"

Shaking her head softly, Pepper softly bit her lower lip; "No…no thank you…I don't feel right leaving Tony any longer than necessary…"

"Is he still unwell?"

Nodding softly, Pepper let out a soft sigh as she leant forward; her elbows on the table as she propped her head with her hands; "I need you to make him a doctor's appointment…his…problem, isn't getting any better, if anything its getting worse, all he's doing is sleeping- and this isn't Tony…at all. I'm sorry to dump this on you Jarvis, but you're the only one he'll listen to."

She could plainly see the upset in the elderly man's face; he wanted to go behind Tony's back as little as she did, but it was at the stage now, where neither had a choice. They needed their Tony back…

"Very well…I shall go and arrange that for you. Do you have any specific time or date in mind Ms Potts?"

"Preferably tomorrow…Taking him today would be a recipe for disaster since I'd have to wake him up; and a tired Tony isn't a fun Tony…by any means."

"Indeed. Very well, consider it done Ms Potts, I will come and inform you of the time hopefully within the hour, if not sooner."

"Thank you Jarvis."

* * *

"Why did I let you and Jarvis talk me into this again?"

"Oh be quiet Tony. You only have another 4 and a-half minutes to wait, and I doubt we'll be in here very long anyway…after all, you've seemed to have made an_ amazing_ recovery overnight."

Hearing a small huff and mumble of words, Pepper peeled her gaze away from her book, just in time to see the male folding his arms behind his head as he leaned back in the chair; legs crossed and lip jutted out; and if she wasn't so annoyed about seemingly wasting her time, she'd have smiled; this was the most Tony like, Tony had been in a month…

It was a comforting sight…

She didn't even realise she was staring till she heard Tony's name called; at first she assumed they were simply early, but looking at the clock said otherwise as the large hand was dead on half past…how embarrassing…

"Well…be back soon, I hope."

Pretending to read her book, Pepper gave a brash nod; muttering out a small "please behave yourself." as he walked away and out of sight.

* * *

"Well Mr Stark, I can honestly say I'm not happy with what I've been told, nor am I convinced that you're 101 percent fine as you keep suggesting. So I'm going to refer you to the Presbyterian Hospital for further tests; now since it's your bladder that's causing the problems you have the choice of a cystoscopy, or an MRI."

The moment cystoscopy left the woman's lips, Tony instantly felt all colour drain from his face; no way in _hell_ was anyone going near something that precious to him, with a freaking microscope!

"Think I'll go with the MRI…anything but the other option…"

"Very well, but do keep in mind that should the MRI not return the results as required, or the doctors feel they need to have a proper check, you will have to have it done."

"Heh, yeah…I'd rather cut it off."

Placing her pen down on the table, the nurse let out a frustrated sigh before sending him an incredulous look;

"Mr Stark, do you not understand the severity of your situation? Going with the information provided by those who have cared for you this past month, you're far from well. And to put it to you bluntly, having you tell me ten minutes prior that you've only been able to partially empty your bladder due to pain these last four weeks pushes me to have you hospitalised today."

"Whoa, wait…what?"

"I believe you heard me. And the more I think about it, the better the idea sounds. And before you give me all you've got verbally; remember this. Should this turn out to be something nasty, you will thank me for this in the long run. Now, while I sort out a referral, I suggest you have someone sort some clean clothes and PJ's out for you since neither of us know how long the hospital will choose to keep you."

And just like that, she was off her chair and Tony was alone, alone and seething; he knew this was a bad idea from the word go. Now here he was being practically forced to stay in a sodding hospital for god only knows how long!

"Well crap."

* * *

"You'll see… it'll be okay. Don't you worry…you…you heard the doctor…the survival rate is good…we'll get you through this…and it'll be better than last time...five years from now, we'll all be laughing… together…around a barbeque at the seaside…doesn't that sound nice? And…as soon as you get the all clear…we'll go on a nice holiday so you can recover…you've always wanted to see Hawaii…we can go there. A nice family trip, and I'll make your father leave his work at home…that way he'll join in."

He'd stopped listening ages ago, taking to simply looking out the window at the bustling life around him. This was all that had left his mother's lips since they'd left the hospital- and though he tried to retain some composure, her constant ramble of how everything would be fine…like this wasn't cancer…this was just a broken leg, was beginning to grate on his already shot nerves…

He wanted so desperately to swear and shout…wanted her to wake up to the reality of the situation, but how could he? She was more of a mess right now than he was- After all…she was there, they both knew the real odds here.

They both knew that in five years' time…or even three for that matter, there was a 50 percent chance he wouldn't be there…

_No._

No that was the wrong frame of mind; dammit…this was _his_ body…and he'd be damned if he let it win this time. Not now, not after everything he went through…he'd be fucked if he gave up now.

"I beat it the first time…and if the odds for survival that time were slimmer than they are _this_ time…then it should be a piece of cake."

Turning her gaze towards him, a fresh stream of tears started to flow down Frigga's face as she placed a trembling hand on her youngest son's cheek; and though it pained him to admit, this was what Loki craved for; a single slither of proof that his mother knew the truth as the traffic lights before them gleamed red.

And who'd have thought something as simple as a set of traffic lights could mean so much to two people? But here it was, laid out before them…at the moment, they were on stop, but within the next ten seconds, they'd be getting ready…then as soon as the green light shone…they'd be off. And much like this road before them; his was going to be long with many a stop on the way…but they would only last so long, then before he'd know it he'd be off again…

After all…Loki was no quitter; even if it meant returning to the same hospital for an indefinite period of time…he'd do it if it meant beating this. The memories he left there, though painful, would be nothing compared to the guilt he'd feel if he left his mother…

Both of them were the family's black sheep…but so long as they had each other, it didn't matter…and that was why, he couldn't bear to leave her alone…he'd do anything to stay with her.

* * *

After that; the rest of their journey home remained in silence, minus the radio, and during this silence, Loki was finally, for the first time since the doctor had given his diagnosis, been able to think; he didn't remember much from the last time…it was a far more aggressive stage that left him either sleeping or being sick 90 percent of the time, and irritable the other 10…

And due to him feeling so agitated, he ended up saying some truly awful things to his mother; things that in his mind, nothing would warrant a substantial apology for…yet, all this wonderful, amazing, kind and loving woman did, was smile and hug him whenever he apologised…like a simple sorry could cover for the tears she'd shed…

So as they pulled into the driveway of their house, Loki reached out, and gently took his mother's hand in his own; his head slightly bowed as he thought of what he wanted to say to her…

"Loki…are you okay baby? If you're tired, I can have Thor help you in-"

"I…I love you. So please, no matter how moody I get during this…or whatever awful things I may say too you…I need you to know now that I love you more than anything- and nothing will change that…I…I can still remember what I said to you last time, and I can't bear to see that expression of pain on your face again…I never meant any of it- I just felt so angry, and I stupidly used you as a vent…I'm so sorry…"

By this point, a small stream of tears were already making their way down his face, but he paid no heed to them; this was his mother…he could always cry in front of her; she was his rock…his everything, and like all times before; she leaned over and wrapped him in her arms; a hand on the back of his head as the other rubbed soothing circles on his back- softly hushing him as he finally let everything from that day out.

And that was how Odin found them almost two hours later as he returned home from work…and as tender a moment as it should have been, he couldn't escape the feeling of someone dumping a bucket of freezing cold water on his head…

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**Annnnnd here is Chapter 2 x3 I do apologize, but halfway through this…I seemed to lose the "who the character is" vibe and I think they're both OOC in a lot of parts…though I do recall hearing that Loki has a very strong bond with Frigga…so hey…I'm not changing the end bit x3 **

**And knowing a couple of people who have been diagnosed with cancer, I'm going with their reactions…since both of them have said that they were fine until they got home and started looking at things, then after realising that they may not be there to do that anymore/again they had a huge breakdown.**

**Oh and yes, both of them are still here and getting better =3 I'm incredibly proud of them both and love them more as friends every day that passes and they're still with me x3 (even if one of you is an online friend ;3 ) You're both so amazing and precious to me T.T My inspirations in life x3**


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